*Disclaimer: Daniel, and anyone else with severe arachnophobia probably shouldn't read this.*
My apartment is overrun. I have no idea how this happened, I have no idea why this happened, I just know that it has to stop. For the past 2 days, I've been noticing a lot of spiders. And when I say "a lot" I mean, every single time I sit down on the couch I see at least one. I've lived in my apartment for almost a year now, and never have I had any insect problems. I don't think I've ever had a roach, last year there were no ants, minimal spider activity- I think Tom's had to get rid of 3 in a year tops.
This year, the insects are making up for it. For the past 2 weeks, there have been ants all over the place. I chalked it up to the rain- it rained almost every day for 2 weeks. Ants can't swim, I get it. Now that it's cleared up outside, and I vacuumed up all the rice-cake crumbs, I haven't seen any more. Did the ants lure the spiders? Don't spiders eat flies? I don't remember ants being featured anywhere in that song....of course, I haven't swallowed any flies lately either, so maybe that's not so applicable.
So, regardless of reasoning, the spiders are here. They're probably a millimeter in size...obviously little baby spiders. But here's the problem- there are like a million of them. Is there a GIANT spider in my house that is just laying offspring left and right? I haven't had any spiders until now- is it spider breeding season? Is there a giant male spider in addition to the obviously present female? How long have these things been gestating? Is there some busted-up egg sac in my apartment somewhere, because that would be totally disgusting. Did the Mom die when all the spiders hatched? (Isn't that what happened to that Charlotte spider?) Whatever. I'm trying not to worry about it because I don't know where they're coming from and I assume at some point they'll die from lack of other bugs to eat, or move out of the house into the wild of the suburbs.
Of course, it doesn't help that I get emails like this:
From: Tom@ilovemybuddy.org
To: Sam@spidervilleusa.com
re: omg the spiders
I'm not really worried. What I would do, is try and track down the source of the tiny spiders, and see if you can locate a small nest or something they're sprouting from. Then vacuum it up, and that should solve the problem.
NEST?!? These things nest?!? Also, I am not emptying a vacuum canister full of live spiders. Absolutely not going to happen. So, I'm sitting on the couch, holding a can of bug spray, jumping a mile everytime a strand of hair brushes my shoulder. And my foot itches. I assume it's a spider bite.
So, if I disappear for another month, it's probably a safe bet that I'm cocooned somewhere in the house. Send help.
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11 comments:
The little ones just hatched, and are looking for a new home. They'll settle into spider hide-outs, and you won't see them any more. They'll still be there, of course, you just won't know it. You'll be much happier.
Oh girl. I'm so hurt. Clearly you've forgotten all about the Parc at Cahaba River, where you got to live with two of your favorite roommates ever, AT THE SAME TIME.
Do you not remember one of our first magical nights? When I looked down, and said "Hm. A spider." Paused, and said, "Hm. Why is the floor moving?"
And you and Pranathi said, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I think I joined in sometime later, because I'm all quicklike.
Oh, I had this happen once at a former apartment. All these little spiders near the ceiling. I used my Dustbuster to sweep up all I could and dumped them outside. Good luck.
All of my spider information comes from the old lady swallowing spiders song and Charlotte's Web, both of which you are familiar. So, I have no new advice, besides getting a bird to swallow the spiders (that wiggled and riggled and jiggled insider 'er) or ask "some pig" to speak on your behalf to the spider family.
I can't believe that "not whitey bulger" reads your blog.
No worries, spiders are harmless and eat lots of mosquitoes! Just think of all the mosquitoes those guys will eat when they grow up.
I hate spiders. I had a major problem out of no where a while back as well. I ended up taping up the vent that leads up the chimney, at the exterminators suggestion, as well as collapsing boxes I had saved to ship things in. I then had the people come and spray again, while I watched them and questioned them as to how to stop the infestation. They told me that since spiders don't groom themselves, poison is useless in keeping them away unless they eat bugs that have consumed the poison. The conclusion is that the pest control people don't know jack crap about spiders or how to get rid of them. But somewhere in between taping up the fireplace and having them spray, the spiders are gone. I haven't seen on in 3 weeks. Good luck, tape up stuff and bug the pest man. Hopefully it will work for you too!
Spiders don't eat mosquitoes - bats do. Get some bats! Then you won't have a mosquito problem.
-t
if it makes you feel better, we found maggots eating our fourth of july fruit pizza last night.
why we did not refrigerate or throw it out last weekend, who knows.
Tom is a retard.
Tom, if you are reading this, be a good boyfriend and go over there with a bat and kill Sam's spiders dead.
We find not many spiders in our place. But my nephew is very much scared about them. We have to ensure that there is no spider inside when he is going to toilet.
I was recently bit by a spider underneath my mustache. I live in Boston. I woke up in the middle of the night to a painfully throbbing and grossly enlarged upper lip. I went to the doctor and was given two shots--tetnis and benadryl.
Today I was looking up commonly found spiders in Boston and stumbled on this post. What was especially funny about it is that my name is Daniel and I am very arachnophobia. That said, after reading your disclaimer, I quickly jumped to the bottom to say hello and share.
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